Hey @Purplekat13 - just a lil tip, if you want other members to be notified that you've responded, you can tag them - use the @ symbol and a drop down will appear, and you can choose their name. If their name isn't there, you can type it out and it should then appear for you to select, then it will show up in blue, like this: @Glisten
Also, just wanted to share some thoughts, hope that's ok! I think you're definitely not alone in your experiences when it comes to trying to set boundaries with your parents. I've heard it described as 'scripts' - as in, we inherit particular narratives or scripts or ways of talking to our family of origin. Then we move away, we learn and grow on our own for a while, and we know that we're not the same person we used to be. But then we go back to family and it's like being a little kid all over again. It's like we can't help ourselves!!
Also, just my opinion but - those are really shitty things your parents are saying, and to me they demonstrate a complete lack of introspective ability. They are seemingly unable to a) reflect on their past actions and b) humbly admit to being human, and thus fallible.
You say that you have no tools to build anything with them, do you mean like, building a more meaningful relationship? I am just sorta thinking (and again, this is just my opinion, and I cannot know for sure so take with a grain of salt) that if they're spitting the same crap they used to say to shut you down when you were younger, are they actually going to be capable of building an adult relationship with you? It sounds like they want to continue treating you like a child.
