Lived Experience Forum

[SmilingGecko]

Hello @PeppyPatti I used to do mobile haircuts years ago and now either do it myself with one of these a crea-clip (see you tube link below) or go to a place that has a ticket booth and you line up in a queue. The best haircuts I ever had there with the ticket booth, they really cared about their clients and did a great cut every time compared to other salons.  A hair trim from these places and the mobile lady was $20 or style is $30. I've been to all kinds of salons over the years but the ticket place did amazing hair transformations

I used to know a lady who cut hair in her laundry and all the "society" ladies used to go there which I thought was funny but that is who used to go there.  Crea-clip has saved me tonnes of money though. If you prefer salons have you thought about going to a student salon at a TAFE? I used to go to student clinics for things like homeopathy which attracts a sizeable price discount and the sessions are supervised by a qualified person 

Heres the crea-clip I tend to cut my hair with. It was a bit of a sensation during the world wide crash and used to make hairdressers angry. I do like hairdressers but when it comes to trying to keep costs down you are faced with no other choice.

They sell these Crea-clips on ebay and Amazon. Mine has lasted ever since I bought it

https://www.youtube.com/@creaclip/videos

[PizzaMondo]

Property talk would have sent me to sleep... ZZzzZzz..

It can be hard to understand how others can not acknowledge the past, I feel like we just sometimes want that acknowledgement. Relationships with our siblings can be tough, especially in adulthood. I can empathise with your feelings around your dream of being close to your brother is crumbling, I have an older sister and while we are sooooo different, it feels kind of impossible some days.. doesn't mean it doesn't hurt still..

I can imagine through experiencing trauma therapy that your life has completely changed. It can provide us with such insight, depth and meaning to our past experiences/trauma and I think it's so important for us to uncover and go on that journey when we are ready. I love to read form you - "I am free" and that mistakes are made daily - but sounds like to me, as is my understanding, this is just life. 🙂

Sitting with you @PeppyPatti ❤️

[PinkFlamingo]

My apologies @StanD , I just found this post! Im sorry for the delay in reply 🤗🌺

Im so glad there's your book club thread now! I cant wait to start getting my eyes into the new C-PTSD workbook 🙂

That makes a lot of sense regarding the trauma therapy group youve recently attended online - sometimes these things can be confronting, and its difficult to moderate what is going on in real time in an online group setting. Im sorry to hear it was hard and traumatic; I gently hope youre feeling better? xx

I really like your description of the book club in terms of how it can be used to share how different things stood out and had meaning for us; the different perspectives from different people bring a real richness to life, I think! 🙂 

Its very kind of you to gently acknowledge our long term member, and Im sure your gentle thoughts and wishes are landing well xx 🙂 

Although I am sorry to hear you had a MH crash on mothers day, and I wanted to gently acknowledge how you were feeling, and how this can be so hard when it happens xx I hope things are improving, and youre starting to feel a bit more centred and better within yourself now 💜

Rest assured you have all the time and space you need to post here on the thread, and please feel free always to go at your own pace, within your comfort zones, and whenever you feel like it xx 🙂

And I just want to say a very heartfelt and humble thanks for your very kind words - that means a lot and I am very grateful to be here with you 🙂 🌺

I hope your doing ok, and your week goes as well as possible xx

[PeppyPatti]

Golly @PinkFlamingo 

Another very thorough sensitive message from you. ......

Thank you. 

It would break my heart if I had a sister ......

Anyway...... 

What trauma therapy has done plus the thread I put up has done is to recognise - 

Without judgement - 

I get involved in friendships and relationships which I stop caring for me. It's extremely painful because iv invested so much of myself for nothing. 

May I ask you something else - 

 

My sons, my precious sons - being mindful of mistakes made - 

When my youngest son was very ill with cancer for 15 years - I became like an octopus 🐙 🦑 with care, tutoring, after school activities then hospitalizations on top - very similar like other parents to be left with nothing. No contact. 

No present adult children spending time with their ol' mum. 

Then managing with head injury issues. Kept to myself. 

I feel, all that is all lost. It's like no calls to just say hi.

No adult children just to take me out for a cuppa. 

Nothing. For years today. 

Then it's again, this wretched guilty wrenching myself away from my ex husband. 

It's like I'm continually drowning 

[Adge]

Hi @PinkFlamingo I hope you are well.

Thanks so much for your insights & suggestions Re: Neami refusing my request for a Support Worker who I might have been able to successfully work with.

Yes it has been an abuse of power (as you put it), especially as they effectively froze me out of communications - & then left me with no Support Worker for almost 3 weeks, so far.

My only means of dealing with the inappropriate response (so far), was to not respond at all to that last provocative email from the Supervisor - received 11 days ago.

I've not found the energy or motivation to lodge any sort of official complaint - Although that sadly means that they will in effect get away with what they did Scott Free, with no negative repercussions.

In the meantime I have still attended their Monday Meditation & Mindfulness Group, twice more.

Without a Support Worker, since they have refused to assign me a new one - They will probably Exit me from their program.

As attendance of their Group Activities requires seeing one of their Support Workers (interconnected).

There has been no Service to speak of, not even meeting Baseline Standards.

Apart from their Meditation Mindfulness Group Facilitators - Who are doing a good job, that Group Activity is very practical (Was Cooking simple food ideas this week)

Adge

[TAB]

Sorry to hear that @Adge  think you are due for some good Karma ..

[PinkFlamingo]

Hey there @PeppyPatti 🌺🙂💜

Just want to kindly acknowledge how hard it must’ve been dealing with your sons cancer and your own head injury, and continuing to give care and support even when it can’t be reciprocated at times..

in the past, I’ve felt that going above and beyond can be either something that people love, and appreciate, and then it feels like the right thing to do, or it is possibly taken for granted, or not able to be appreciated, and then it feels so draining, so one-sided, and so disheartening to have done. 
I learnt it’s not so much what I’ve done, it’s the way it was received that either boost or deflates how I feel about that help 💜🌺

And as you’ve rightly said, there are times when we lose our boundaries and start to sacrifice our comfort to do stuff for others. This is really hard to avoid when we have such good desire to help - however, gently, we can’t pour from a cup that is empty - we have to let that cup sit upright and be refilled 🌺🙂

I’m so sorry you don’t have contact with your adult children, it’s really hard when adults make decisions which we don’t understand nor seem to be deserved 😔💜

The reality sadly is that it takes a change of heart in them and them alone for things to be different and it’s something which has no time estimation that can be given. 
There’s always hope, however alongside that hope is an ever restless sense of time passing while waiting for a connection 🌺

I do understand (in a different way - I do not have children) how hard it can be 💜

and the boundaries you put in place to give yourself space regarding supporting your ex husband sound like they’ve been difficult to do, too 🌺

however, please do remember that you do deserve happiness, and sometimes that happiness is found when we gently loosen the grip on the things we yearn for but cant reach, or trust that the things we can’t fix for someone else have other solutions that we can’t yet see 🙂🌺

try to give yourself some solace that you’re doing your best within your ability and boundaries, and for that, you deserve some inner peace 💜🙂 because that’s all anyone can ever ask of themselves 🌺

I hope this is a bit helpful in some way 💜🫂🙂🌺

[PeppyPatti]

@Glisten 

that’s what I like to hear….. 

change your image 

had you thought about it for a while or was it a morning decision ? Short hair is cool……

I had my hair to medium but didn’t like it…. 

I love my hair today esp. since Im spending $75 on it every 2 months today…. 

Found this pic online…. 

[PinkFlamingo]

Hey there @Adge 🌺🙂

I’m so sorry they haven’t upheld service standards, and it seems so disheartening if they don’t keep up the mindfulness group without a support worker - I wish they were responsive to your needs 💜

I totally understand not having the motivation to be chasing after help in escalating complaints; these things do take energy and commitment which is difficult for anyone but even moreso when we carry so much load alone 🌺

I wondered if you might feel interested in disability advocacy supports (or even if they could help you in some way, like standing with you to escalate your complaint)? 

Please don’t feel any pressure to engage with them, however I found a couple of sites if you’re interested sometime..

 
https://www.advocacywa.org.au/ 

https://unitingwa.org.au/services/ndis-advocacy/ 

https://www.dana.org.au/find-an-advocate/ 
https://www.wa.gov.au/organisation/department-of-communities/advocacy-services-people-disability 

I hope this is helpful in some way for you - however im conscious that this could be too much info…please do feel free to take your own pace or even not worry about it if you’d prefer not to 🙂🌺

I thought I’d provide it just in case, so you have options at your fingertips if you wanted them 💜🙂🌺

I hope your evening goes as well as possible, and take good care of you  🌺

[PeppyPatti]

Yes @Adge 

its difficult getting a good support worker. I read that post @PinkFlamingo  wrote to you. I remember how @PinkFlamingo so eloquently wrote that message.  

I feel reading your message that you felt heard by @PinkFlamingo .

and I feel heard by @PinkFlamingo too. 

Back to you……

Im wondering if you are able to go to a group class and just comment about how vulnerable you feel. 

I apologise if this is something you would not do or you have done as much as you can. 

It just feels unfair.