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17-01-2019 07:18 PM
17-01-2019 07:18 PM
Re: Life can be a Pain
Thanks @outlander
Yes - that was a big session - it could have been confronting having had no warning about a new/different doctor - but she took me seriously and let me decide what medication to change - I had already thought about most of it anyway
But yes - I was in her office for a long time and I had waited for a long time - I left home around 1.30 pm and went to see my doctor afterwards and got home just before 5.00 pm and it has been a big day and a busy week
Dec
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17-01-2019 07:26 PM
17-01-2019 07:26 PM
Re: Life can be a Pain
It's great posting with your too @Appleblossom - I learn a lot from you
And it is always great to have feed back
I love opera too - and the theatre - I have seen a few things - I have always enjoyed seeing productions live
And it is wonderful to have this in common - I seem to find myself somewhere in whatever I see - one was The Trojan Women - and The Medea also Cosi fan Tutti in English - and others less impressive -
And yes @Zoe7 - we have to clean the finger marks off our touch screens - it is harder than just dusting it
Dec
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17-01-2019 07:26 PM
17-01-2019 07:26 PM
Re: Life can be a Pain
here for you my second mum @Owlunar , sitting with you xoxo
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17-01-2019 07:31 PM
17-01-2019 07:31 PM
Re: Life can be a Pain
Thanks @Shaz51 - my other daughter
It's wonderful to have someone understanding and know they understand the world of the mind and heart and the helpful language we use in the forum - we "hear" each other's writing and we "sit" with each other and yet I would not really be heard if I spoke to my real daughter - though to be fair - she is a lot more caring than in the past - she is a very practical person
The forum family members are really here for each other
Dec
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17-01-2019 07:36 PM
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17-01-2019 07:36 PM
17-01-2019 07:36 PM
Re: Life can be a Pain
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17-01-2019 07:59 PM
17-01-2019 07:59 PM
Re: Life can be a Pain
You have had a really busy week so far @Owlunar Hope tomorrow is a rest day for you. I read about you appointment today - some changes and majot things to think about. The loss of your son has had a big impact on your life and it can't hurt having someone to talk that through with. Hydro did wonders for my back so I hope you find it okay for you and it helps with your knee. I am back to the pool next week myself as they will be open all day again and I can get back into a routine again. It has been a big few weeks for you but you are dealing with it all as best you can. I hope you can organise your next trip away to give yourself some much needed time out and can recharge your batteries a bit and feel a little better for it.
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17-01-2019 08:02 PM
17-01-2019 08:02 PM
Re: Life can be a Pain
Thanks @outlander
I think the medication changes will be okay - I will be sorting this out with my doctor when he gets back next week
And things are changing all the time at the pain clinic - it used to be the case that nothing changed for years - maybe that's why I wasn't given any warning about the change in the doctor
Having something attended to about my knee is a relief - I thought that surgery was the only way to go with the state my knee is in - but there are other things that can put off an operation for longer and I am in favour of that
I never thought to see the psychologist there though - it was never discussed or even suggested
Really - I have been extra tired lately - I still think it's the heat but the idea of something different happening - can feel uneasy but yes - gradually I am feeling positive about it
Dec
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17-01-2019 10:22 PM
17-01-2019 10:22 PM
Re: Life can be a Pain
Wonderful news @Owlunar That this pain specialist has organised therapy for you. And yes, traumatic grief or traumatic loss - they sound right for what you have and are experiencing.
Here holding your hand. ❤
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18-01-2019 11:43 AM
18-01-2019 11:43 AM
Re: Life can be a Pain
Hi @Zoe7@outlander@Shaz51@utopia@BlueBay
It was a huge week and yes - I feel as if I have had a bunch of big weeks lately - I slept 8 hours straight through last night - I was so tired I thought I would just go to bed but decided to shower because it is so humid and I felt sweaty - and maybe that helped to sleep so long too
My domestic and shopping lady will be here soon - but it's easy when she is doing my ironing - I can sit and chat with her when she does that - and I do like to do my own shopping - I like to pick things out for myself - it's an outing too though today it might be an effort with this humidity
Seeing another psychologist was not something I planned but this time whoever it is knows I don't want to talk about my mother - I did not like the way the last one was picking around in my brain like the birds eating breadcrumbs off the concrete - as if she was just checking it out to see what she could find - but I really don't hide much from myself so this will be different - I will be talking about the trauma of not just the death but the life of my son - I often wonder if I did enough for him or too much for him - I over-extended myself and I was exhausted when he died. And the last thing I said to him was that I had warned him that this day had come - he had broken the law often and now in a way that could not be ignored - I couldn't help him anymore.
That is a terrible thing to remember but I know this too - it wasn't my choice - he made those choices and although I might and do understand a lot of his reasons - it is still hard.
And I hope I don't have to think about it again today - my helper today laughs at my jokes and we both have a good time and I like getting out of the house to shop too - I enjoy it.
What you say about a routine Zoe is such a good idea - I guess I have a routine now that works but the thought of going out more often feels good and I think I can go to the U3A- they must have something I am interested in because I am interested in so much - and also I thought about learning to sign - I thought about this when my mother was losing her hearing but she was not interested herself and so I never followed that up
There's a lot of good things to do really - and I hope we don't get a lot of fires in Gippsland because I would like to go to Lakes Entrance but still thinking - there is always Tassie - I love Tassie - and when I see pictures of Mount Wellington I feel homesick and there is one photo I have seen on TV often where I can see Wrest Point standing up so clearly I remember the great time I had there with all those diningrooms and cafes and the views and being so close to the estuary - I might just take that option though I think my relatives are too ill for me to visit though I could let them know I will be in Hobart - that does feel like a good idea
Still making plans - but making plans is a great way to live especially when I really can make some of my dreams come true
I am feeling a little tired - a lot tired actually - but I think I have come around a big corner in my life and think things might get better -
Thanks all my dear friends for just being there as well as sending messages and pictures - those are lovely flowers Shaz
Dec